An Open Letter to Clothing Stores Everywhere

I went in two Target stores recently looking for plain t-shirts and hoodies to buy for an upcoming trip and was disgusted to find that their Plus Size section had been turned into a clearance section. The signs were changed to say “Women’s” like Plus Size people aren’t women, too. I wasn’t a frequent Target clothing shopper, I hated that most of their clothes weren’t as cute as the “regular” section, and that you had to walk through Maternity (which also shrunk, btw. but still exists) just to get there. Like Plus Size is an afterthought, a blip in the clothing size radar.

So I get to this section has has miraculously disappeared. There are a few plus size shirts amongst piles of other clearance items, but that’s about it. I actually go and try a different Target, closer to my home. Maybe this one is different. I was disappointed to find it isn’t any different. And for a few small moments in time I felt like Target was trying to tell me that I don’t deserve to buy their clothing, that I don’t need a few simple t-shirts from Target, or a hoodie that zips.

I can count on one hand the number of stores that carry Plus Size clothing in-store. Most of those stores sell shirts for around $50 and I think they think they can get away with it because there’s such low competition. Let me tell you something, there’s a lot of plus size people around.

And you can get on your high horse and scoff and say that plus sized people are unhealthy and need to lose weight. Sure, if that makes you sleep better at night keep on thinking about that. Forget that you do not know anything about my health, especially not from looking at me. And more importantly, no matter how healthy or unhealthy I am in the present moment I cannot fit into normal size clothes and that doesn’t mean I’m less of a person. Just because XXL isn’t the same as 1X or 2X doesn’t mean I don’t deserve to wear clothes that don’t have shoulder pads and cost more than two fancy dinners. They’re not even good quality clothing, not really.

Big brands like Lululemon and Abercrombie and Fitch have already spoken out about why they don’t offer plus sized clothes. I’ll tell you right now that even if I wasn’t plus sized, I wouldn’t support your clothing line.

Lots of stores carry larger sizes online. That’s something, maybe, but it’s also asking your customers to take a gamble. If I can’t figure out what size I am and where I might fit into your spectrum of “plus sized” I might not have the patience to try and guess (hint: I don’t) that might fit me. It’s more than frustrating to go into a store and try on something that doesn’t fit. I cannot find a pair of jeans that will simultaneously fit and also not fall down when I’m walking. Lane Bryant has these “genius fit” plans that are supposed to be amazing and fit everyone just right. Hint: they don’t even come close.

So do me a favor and consider everyone of every size, appeal to the masses and don’t shut us out just because we aren’t some standard of normal. No one is any less or a person because of their size.

 xoxo

Melanie Kristy

How To Be Alone

I completely adore this video/ poem. I may have posted it before. It’s one of those things I just needed to watch today. Do you ever feel like there’s something out there you need to watch? Maybe it’s this. Maybe, something else.

love always,
Melanie Kristy

How To Be Your Own Valentine

(weheartit)

Valentine’s Day is for suckers, right? It’s the sickly sweet Hallmark holiday that people roll their eyes at yet celebrate anyway. Or they ignore it. Or they broadcast their hate.

If we strip down all of the consumerism we are left with a day mid February that could be or mean anything you can it to.

Last year I wrote How To Survive Valentine’s Day Alone but this year I’m changing the focus just a tiny bit. I’m changing it to yourself and taking the focus off the “alone” part. Because there’s nothing wrong with being alone. And no one can love you if you don’t love yourself first.

I think Valentine’s Day should be a day for love — your love for yourself or someone else. But right now let’s focus on you.

* buy yourself a house plant
* make the time to do something for yourself. Take a nap. Get a pedicure. Anything that will take you away from stress and the real world for a few moments.
* make yourself chocolates. Better yet, double the batch and make some for someone else, too.
* go back to your elementary school days and make yourself a Valentine out of red construction paper and doilies. The gaudier the better.
* take a moment to think about what you can do for yourself each day to make every day a little better
* go through your things and throw out /sell/ give away/ donate 100 items that you own
* paint your bathroom a shade of pink
* call someone and tell them you love them. Giving love away is a way to make it come back to you.
* don’t stress about the holiday, or lack there of.
* make a list of all of the things you love about yourself. start with physical traits and just keep on going until you don’t have any more paper
* don’t complain today. to yourself or anyone else. The negativity is bringing you down
* eat that festive treat

How do you spend your Valentine’s Days?

How To Survive Valentine’s Day Alone

(weheartit)

This is my 26th year I’ll be alone on Valentine’s Day. By alone, I mean single. Each year it comes and it goes and I buy cute heart shaped things and give Valentines to my friends. Sometimes I work. Sometimes I have platonic dinner dates. My mom gives me cute festive decorations and some years my dad gives me a card.

Valentine’s Day is one of these days that has  basically turned into a “need not apply” day.

I am single. I am independent and I will celebrate me on this day because no one else will ever celebrate me the way I can. I think Valentine’s Day is a day that shouldn’t be ignored. Too many people disregard it. They get angry because they feel that Valentine’s Day is over-commercialized. It’s a Hallmark Holiday. I say, So what? Valentine’s Day is what you make of it.

And sure, no one should need a reason to share love with anyone. No one should only do something special for someone on one certain society promoted day. But this day is here to remind you to love someone. Sometimes we forget.

Here are some suggestions of ways to make Valentine’s Day special for you:

– Sleep in if you can – give yourself that time to get the extra sleep you deserve.
– Make Valentines for others – giving gifts is guaranteed to make yourself feel happier
– Take a bubble bath –  buy a bath bomb from Lush and soak until your skin turns into a raisin.
– Buy yourself flowers/ chocolates. I have them delivered to you while you’re at work.
– Take yourself on a date – dinner and a movie? Your treat? Why not, you deserve it.
– Exercise – run, do yoga, dance, walk with people you love. If you love your body, you’ll move it.
– Hit the sheets early and show yourself some love. (Details on that are for a whole other kind of blog, baby).

How do you celebrate Valentine’s Day?