I’ve got nothing to say and everything on my mind. I want to keep replaying Counting Crows songs until something makes more sense. I have this terrible ability to make myself SO overwhelmed. Over nothing. Sometimes it’s over something. It’s like my mind can’t go in a straight line. It goes all of the place, all of a sudden. It looks like a child scribbled lines in all different colored markers until the page tore through.
This whole blogging thing is going to change for me. For a while I was so into it, and don’t get me wrong, I’ve been writing online for years and year and year. I’m not going to stop. But I’m not going to sit here and pretend that this blog is going to be something more than it is.
It’s just going to be me. Melanie Kristy. It’s going to be me and my readers, all of you lovely folks out there who are taking the moments to read a few lines of nonsense.
It’s us together.
It’s not about writing to please an audience, about attracting readers. I believe the right readers will be attracted. The right company will find its way here. This is about me, wholly.
And in the past year that I’ve been writing or not so writing as the case often seems to be, I’ve lost that. This is a personal site, the musings of a writer and librarian in training who is in her twenty somethings and finding armor and tools to rip her way through this world. It’s about a girl who stocks her shelves with teen literature, counts on a group of friends online to keep her inspired and writing (no pressure;) ) and is figuring out how to balance things. It’s about a girl who can’t balance things but tries anyway. It’s the journal of an online junkie, a girl who can’t remember life without the internet as sad as that statement makes her. It’s about a girl who is obsessed with camera apps on her phone, takes too many pictures of herself and has the same favorite band since she was twelve.
It’s about me. Melanie Kristy.
It’s nice to (re) meet you. We’ve only just begun.
Now tell me about you.
My first official work day of 2012 was gunked up by my inability to get out of bed. I reset my alarm for an hour later — the actual time I would normally wake up — they lay in bed for a half hour awake and in the end didn’t get any writing done. I’ve decided that this will be my year for writing. So I am going to go ahead and get writing.
I am also here to tell you that there are only 77 days left until the first day of spring. This is an important count down to me and while I usually start it on January first each year, I missed a couple days. This could be because I’ve been taking vitamin D supplements so I am slightly less ridden with Seasonal Affective Disorder. Or maybe because I’m coming back from a long weekend. Either way.
It’s practically spring already! I am saying this from a position where I’ve yet to bring my winter coat up from the basement, but I left my house heavily adorned in a beautiful scarf I received for Christmas. I choose my battles and in the battle against cold, I opt for scarves over coats. I like to hold on to that shred of hope that winter won’t really come for yet another day.
So what I come to you today with is reason that, unfortunately for us, winter is a necessary evil for this time of year. At least for those in the northern part of the hemisphere.
* Winter is necessary for Holidays to feel like Holidays. All of the songs sing about the cold, the snow and chestnuts roasting on an open fire (that open fire won’t be necessary in the summer!)
* Rebirth. The year is like a Pheonix. It needs to burn and die in order to come back again in the spring.
* It’s harder to appreciate the beautiful greens, luscious flowers and birds chirping in the Spring when you haven’t gone without for four or five months.
* The bugs tend to die off in the cold.
* Snowy owls (like Hedwig!) wouldn’t exist.
* The cold weather makes hot chocolate taste better. This is a known fact, proclaimed by me.
It’s been snowing for years. There’s three feet of dirty hard snow covering our lawns, piles that reach higher than your head up against the road because there is no place for it to go. Can you imagine the world turning into a river if spring ever comes? We’d make rafts of our sleds and close our eyes, holding on to the sides and laughing while gliding away, away, away… One night I made a snowman by the light of my headlights. It was full of pieces of grass and bits of dirt. It’s snowed five times since then, washing out the snowman in a sea of angry white. We can’t get by with just one of anything, snow shoes do not equal work shoes, layers of clothing to keep us warm. Maybe there hasn’t been a sun in months, I wouldn’t really know. People are wrapping themselves around telephone poles because they hit the breaks too fast, buildings are collapsing into themselves because of the weight of three feet of snow. And nothing has melting, no. Not until today it rained for a while before turning to ice. Our streets turned into frozen rivers, our puddles teasing with the hard layer that sits on top. Geese try to hide their faces from the brutal winds, but the water is too cold to offer release. The children are going to attend school well into the summer, melting with humidity and yearning for freedom. We delight in the delays, but it takes just that much longer to heat up the car, clear off the snow, find that spare glove. Did you know you can get pulled over for having snow on your roof? No kidding? Tonight I drove home with ice beads pinned to my wind shield. There have been days when I’ve driven with my hand clutching the door closed. First the door is frozen closed, then the latch it frozen and it won’t stay. I locked myself out of my running car because the lock stopped working, when I thought I was unlocking it, I really locked it up. My brother has been working for approximately four weeks straight. Snow plows can’t make any more room, snow blowers keep aiming snow right into the streets. Our gloves are wet and our skin dry from the cruel games this weather plays.
A few years back I unintentionally started my own tradition to begin the spring countdown on the first day of the year. I could go without January and February and think nothing of it. I miss living in California, the warmth of the sun during the day, the complete lack of snow. I miss not feeling like I may never see the sun, ever again. I miss green and life. These are the burning days of the pheonix, waiting to be reborn.
The temperatures are miserable outside, the visabilty is lacking. You woke up early to shovel off/ brush/ de-ice your car and brew copious amounts of tea. Then you are bombarded with text messages from your co workers, or you think to call the emergency hotline at your work. Either way, there’s one big announcement, work is closed! It’s a snow day! You haven’t seen one of these since high school, and you wish all your friends were around to go sledding or have snowball fights with. Maybe you lose power or you’re snowed into your driveway.
What are you to do? Well, don’t worry! I’ve come up with a list of suggestions you might enjoy.
* Go back to bed. Those blankets sound so inviting. Turn on a movie and fall back asleep for as long as you wish.
* Enjoy the snow! Make a snowman, brush off your car, try to play fetch with your dog (who only wants to go for a walk — too bad the terrible driving makes for even worse walking conditions).
* Drink a lot of hot drinks. Hot tea, coffee or experiment with flavouring hot chocolates. I just tried to make hot chocolate using a recipe on the back of a box of Hershey’s Cocoa Powder. Unfortunately it did not turn out well.
* Do your taxes online. Taxslayer and Turbotax are cheap/free and rather easy. Okay so it may be a little early to do them now, I haven’t gotten any of my forms in the mail yet. At least you could plan what you’re going to do with your refund! (Or try to think of ways to get that extra money to pay what you owe).
* Catch up on all that housework you’ve been meaning to do. Laundry? Check. Dishes? Check. Hey, it’s not fun work, but it has to get done sometime. (And at least you’ll have something to wear to work tomorrow).
* Look at pretty pictures of snow on We Heart It
* Catch up on your Google Reader or any other RSS Feeder you use. Comment on blog posts instead of passing them by.
* Write letters to people you haven’t seen in a while. Better yet, make your own stationery and envelopes, too!
* Light a candle, curl up on your bed and watch a movie. No need to really stress out about what needs to be done — you wouldn’t be home to do it anyway if it wasn’t for the snow!