On Slowing Down

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It’s December, already? How does this happen, anyway? How does time pass and all of a sudden you are here in this moment and you aren’t sure how you got here or why you’re here or what’s even going on. But it’s December, in 2012, the month that, according to the Mayans, the world is going to end.

Or the world as we know it.

That could mean we’ll be disconnected, battling a war on home grounds, without chocolate, the end of The Twinkie. It could mean natural disaster. It could not mean anything at all.

But if we take a second to think about it, trace the steps to how we got here in this very moment maybe, if the eternal light goes out on December 21st (or we lose someone or something or go through heart break or get sick or lose our jobs or become lost in the woods), maybe we can take a moment and inhale the pine and Christmas cookie scent, taste the peppermint lip gloss and sit in this moment.

& remember

Remember anything, really. Like those times when your biggest struggle was learning how to tie your shoes. The first concert you went to without adult supervision. What it’s like to graduate school with a degree. The last amazing meal you ate. The last time you really, truly laughed until your eyes watered (and then you laughed some more).

In reality I hate the busyness that comes with “growing up” and responsibility. I hate feeling stick with all these obligations because socially its become part of what’s “acceptable”. I’m going to school and working full time. I kind of hate it. But I don’t hate going to school. I don’t hate working.

And I really enjoy those free weekends full of Christmas lights, too much pizza, laughing until you cry and then ending the (too short) weekend with being immersed in beautiful, descriptive fiction.

But in the busy days its hard to remember what it’s like not to feel bush or stressed. It’s hard to remember what it’s like being five years old and riding a bicycle without training wheels for the first time. It’s that busyness that takes away. When we forget to breathe, we forget to acknowledge and we forget about the moment we are in or the times that we’ve already had.

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2 thoughts on “On Slowing Down

  1. I love this post so much. Your writing is amazing and I’m so happy to call you my friend. Our circle on Saturday night was all about the changes we have gone through the past year. The way our worlds have ended in a way, our own apocalypse.

    And the come down from all the craziness of those changes. The way we sit back and think to ourselves, “Well that is done and it didn’t matter too much anyway.” I mean, the worst thing I thought could possibly happened to me happened two months ago, and I didn’t die. For a moment I thought I was going to die. In a way I did. Because that girl I had been before and that life I had been living came to an end and I had to start over. I had to build my world again. It’s been an amazing experience.

    What I am most impressed with is how I have learned to let go of stress and worry and to just live my life one day at a time. It is exciting and beautiful and I can’t wait to move forward into 2013, if it comes. Or enjoy the last days of 2012 if it doesn’t come.

    And I love you. Always

  2. Hey dollface, this is an excellent post. Thanks for the reminder to slow down and immerse myself in the holiday season so if nothing else I have beautiful memories to carry with me into the “new world”.

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